Cheese dreams

Cheese dreams, originally uploaded by Food Photography.

The term comes to an end soon. My term at internship i.e.. The experience.. has been you know what since you and me are the only ones talking here.

The good thing is that I'm so much at office I haven't really eaten a lot, and hence have not gained too much weight, something I did well at earlier vacations.

The bad thing is I haven't had time enough with the camera, limiting myself to the menial task of doing you know what.

There are conflicting thoughts going through my mind these days. On one day, I want to be on the business side, selling combs to bald men (and women). On the other, I want to carve the most exquisite ivory combs, complete with studded rubies and pearls. I know its a very hairy tail, but the place it takes place is right below some of them. (whatever that's supposed to mean)

Delhi will be away for at least 4 months once I leave this monday. Thoughts are as they have been at such a time. This time, I'm looking forward to quite a few things. First in line is the clothes-washing experience that I haven't had yet. A maid at the penthouse did all the work while I slept off my college transience. So, that should be quite an experience. In fact, cooking and washing clothes (and knowing how to iron/fold them) are two things Mom really wants me to learn. Hope all her wishes come true and well.

A lot of people start doing a lot of work at home once they come back from a place they are living alone. I have done no such thing. I'm still a slob who can surf the internet 18X7 and trudge around things. Hope Life will treat me better than I treat it. Here's a cheesy dream.

?

Spending plastic money,
living manufactured dreams,
talking words that are cool,
wearing clothes that have a tag,
tagging friends all over the place,
hearing songs for the billionth time,
reading bestsellers.

Not too much of life left to one's own self. There isn't really no self. Its just an advertised trip to existence. For today, and the times to come.

Randomness is a state of being. If one can't get attached to randomness, they can't value specific things, because there universe is so much smaller. If we didn't appreciate every book we read, we would've read and loved only so many books in this lifetime. And that would be whose loss? Mine? No way. I get my refuge in randomness of the arcane kind. It gives me clarity to identify and choose brilliant pieces of life that I carry with me.

Just a random bit of thought that sprouted out on an IM conversation about porn. See where life can take you? The limits are endless.

Today is the youngest you will ever be. Act like it.

Uatus

There we go again! And again! How many false starts can one make? I have made the 101st now. Yes, totalling my old and new blogs, we are there.

Yesterday evening I spent a considerable amount of time going through my old blog. Just like that. Wanted to see how I felt about things 2 years on. I'm slowly recovering. Maybe.

Have been reading a lot of blogs these past few days. Some are funny, the other raunchy, while others just take your goat with what people can come up with in self-induced fits of shrink-worthy-but-since-I-write-well commentary on their lives. Not that I haven't been doing the same thing (at times).

Randomness has now become a state-of-the-art activity for me. Reading through unnecessary, irrelavant and creative things are supposed to be good for the sponge factor, but sometimes your brain becomes too soggy to touch. Know what I mean?

Many people these days who blog, blog about the lack of time they have to surf aimlessly. While I have a surfeit of it, I still claim lack of time. And will do always. Don't really know what others do but this is my escape. Where I don't have to listen- to repetitive rants, to respectless replies, to road rage addicts and all other random being that inhibit my planet.

15 more days and I'll be on the hilltop. During the past 1 year and more, (I've almost cleared my 1st year, barring a coupla backlogs due to outstation projects) I've mastered the art of speaking well and doing nothing.

Just spent a little time refecting the other day. The amount of work and the passion that I've put into life would put a day's work before that to shame. Truly.

A restock is required. I've now reached a phase where a re-entry into the past, pre-BPO, might happen. Have started selling taps again. And might trudge into equity research soon. Considering trading choice-of-career with peace-of-mind. Money on this side is as good if not better. Gotta do. Thinking.

I have not read a single book in the last 19 days. That's a record. Yes, I'm narcisstic and vainly so. When it comes to books, I'm an exhibitionist, uninhibitedly revealing all that has gone into my mind.

I really feel like giving the world a miss from here on. I think anti-social people fare really well. There are two of them whose blogs I'm dying to read what's on their mind, but they just don't. Just keep yourself to yourself and that's that. Thinking.

Today was a day different from a lot of others in the very recent past. As soon as I woke up, for no rhyme or reason, God's name was on my lips. I think there might be a reawakening of sorts happening. Lets see.

Now why exactly is that last paragraph here is something I JUST refuse to understand.

Tumble Squeeze

The last few days have been a humbling, enlightening and enriching experience. This could have very well been a long and enduring rant about what I've been upto the last few days. Rather, its what it is-

I've been working at HawaiTelephone Corporate Communication Team for the past 15-odd days. These are the brightest people in Public Relations who've spent atleast 9 years each in PR or more. And they called me in to work. They did, yeah?

Now the work is simple- we have to create the history of an Indian conglomerate over the past 11 years. And yours truly's task is simple- to sift through press stories of these decade that passed, and mark out relavant ones. How's that for "work". But then, I used to tell everyone, this is what interns get to do, once we're out there in the market we'll get to know our real worth and all that jazz. And I always thought myself to be on the other side of the divide. Hell, I've put in more donkey hours than all my classmates combined in the last 8 odd-years, no? Been corporate manager and all that jazz.

Zilch!

The manager is not interested in my lineage, experience or anything like that. He has a pile of tactile material to go through and he needs hands on board. There's only one glitch- he has me. And I have a problem (not that I can do anything about it,and this is not a rant yeah?)

So, all day long, from whenever I manage to reach office (that's another story for later), till late evening, I go through press stories, atleast a good 1500 every day. And then I sort things out, note them down and file them for scanning. There's no end to the misery. You know the film scenes where they show a person's progress through Newspaper headlines? That's what goes through my mind everyday. I've been given an office that normally is reserved for the executive management. And people there think that I'm some big shot audit manager going through piles of documents, and will one day emerge with the dirty linen. So, there's a lot of Sir's and please's flowing around.

But that's about it, I just have a rather saturnine boss, and rather nice he is, my college alumni and all. There's some good faces around, some being one. And I've an office where I can sit comfortably with my shoes off.

Now I know the value of manual work. I respect worker ants more. I've taken a humbling piece of wisdom to my brain. I don't hate my boss. He's just letting the shit flow down as it comes to him. Poor soul rechecks all the work I do. Works longer and more seriously than me.

Its very stupendifying. There are moments where I have visions of burning it all up, but then think about the stupid fire alarm. And then I just race through a few to settle down again.

There's something cooking in my head. Let's see what I do in the week to come. Will keep ya all posted, and all that jazz.

Ciao

Anthology

I consider myself fairly well read. In order to keep this consideration in place, I make a fair effort to read as much as possible. The last 3 weeks have been a whirlwind activity of reading as much as I could. Most of it was random stuff that hasn't made me accomplish anything major but I've still given it a go.

Till last week, I developed an interesting habit of reading on the go. i.e. reading while driving. Which was basically reading while crawling. The daily commute to gurgaon took two freakin' hours crawling all the way. Stopped that as of now for obvious reasons. Had the binding of Ogilvy's Confessions of an advertising man come out for it was in the heat in the car all day.

Have started reading a truckload of blogs these days. Some of them for industry gossip and others for knowledge upgradation. Hanging out with the big boys of the media industry, has brought up a few new names for adding to my reading calendar.

Is there a term for addiction to reading? I read backs of product packages, blogs, books, magazines, annual reports, financial and general news dailies, general and industry specific magazines, newspaper supplements ranging from branding to HR, non-fiction, random leaflets, flyers etc. on a fairly regular basis.

I guess I'm showing off. Maybe. I just like to share what I'm upto. Even though I look like a prick with it.

Then I've started to twitter. Its a micro blogging website where you answer a single question- What are you doing? I'm here.
The reason for doing this is simple. You can find out your own.

Priority

Not so long ago, when I used to be a successful (relatively, to my age) corporate exec, I used to think that work was the best mistress one could have. After all, it pays in Cash, and rather kindly at that.

Then, life changed for the worse, personally; and much better professionally. After all the flux and churn that lasted a few years, I decided the opposite must be true(Not that having a mistress was the best work, but thereabouts). And I went for a two year vacation. Only half time has been approached, but I already feel like going back to the old days, when hard work that broke my back (literally) is the thing to do.

It breaks your back, but keeps your mind sane. It fogs your vision, but keeps your line of sight clear. You might have scraped knees and other battle wounds, but you'll get on with them before you can say Pyrric Victory. I guess that's a rather long and difficult word to say, but then so is life.

You lose your voice, your say in things that do and don't matter. Not that it matters much because you've more or less let go yourself. But, life turns around. Both places you go to and were at are filled with unfair people who think just because you don't do a lot of work, you are without work, and they dismiss you as just one of those who don't really matter. They think you want to take up administering an institute, take recognisance of how a house is run, and how life should be lived. Not an ideal way to lead life when you've been used to being in the lead.

A day at a time. Not really the way to go. Got to have a scheme to scheme people around. Else they take your pants off in public. Not that it's happened yet. But can happen sooner than I think. Or you.

Priority.

Ciao.